Cornwall veteran who went from struggling with alcohol to working for a drug and alcohol service shares his story for Armed Forces Day

Military veteran Graham, 53, who struggled with alcohol after leaving the army and experiencing the death of his son, is sharing his recovery story for Armed Forces Day 2026.

Now working for the drug and alcohol charity which helped him, Graham wants anyone in the armed forces community to know that help is there if they need it.

After leaving the army Graham experienced acute anxiety, but even after getting help with Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), he kept using alcohol to cope.

He explains, “Looking back, I can see that the drinking was ramping up, always. It was the go-to: if something went wrong, you drank. If something went well, you drank.”

Tragically, six years ago, Graham’s eldest son suddenly passed away: “It was a very traumatic and sad time, but looking back on it now, I didn’t deal with it and continued to work solidly. There was a lot of drinking which masked and delayed the grief – I buried it.”

This period of Graham's life coincided with the start of the Covid-19 pandemic in 2020. Graham suddenly found himself locked down at home, and his drinking escalated. 

“I started making excuses as to why 'it’s okay' to have a drink during the day,” he sighs. “This went on through lockdown, and it just got worse and worse until I was at a point where I’d stopped drinking for enjoyment - the depression and anxiety was really high. The only way that I could get on top of it was to have a drink – I stopped drinking beer and started drinking vodka to subdue the anxiety.” 

Concerned for his well being, Graham's partner helped him find a rehab centre. He checked in for 28 days. It was at this point that Graham had a 'lightbulb moment'.

“I thought rehab was brilliant,” says Graham. “I started eating properly again, and I completed all the courses – including meditation. It was an amazing experience because I didn’t miss alcohol – I was drinking cups of tea like they were going out of fashion." 

To aid Graham’s recovery, his partner contacted WithYou, and spoke to Mark Thomas, WithYou’s Armed Forces Coordinator for Cornwall.

“He was amazing – he was very understanding and keen to help us,” Graham smiles. “I was then assigned a Recovery Worker who was also ex-forces, which really helped. I went along to a session with ex-veterans. I really enjoyed listening to other people’s experiences, and it made me realise that we are all in the same boat.”

Since his recovery, Graham has been working at WithYou as a Recovery Worker: “I really wanted to work for WithYou and help others who have gone through similar experiences.”

Andy Craze, National Armed Forces Lead at WithYou, says:

"Graham’s journey is a powerful example of what recovery looks like in practice. Having experienced our service firsthand, he now brings a unique and valuable perspective to the work we do.

“Veterans have given their lives to their country, and we are proud to play a small part in improving access to the support that they, and their families, deserve.

“Armed Forces Day is an important opportunity to raise awareness of the help available, and we would encourage anyone who is struggling with alcohol or drugs to get in touch with WithYou."

WithYou’s Armed Forces Community programme, which helped Graham, provides specialist support for military personnel, veterans and their families. WithYou is the first drug and alcohol provider to have been awarded the Ministry of Defence’s Gold Award in their Employer Recognition Scheme.